My name is Robyn Nichols and I have walked in your shoes. I’ve experienced the phone call that you thought you’d never have. I am a praying mama and I’m sure you are as well. So when God allows such loss and heart wrenching pain it shakes you to your core. I know we have all screamed at God and questioned why. I also know that the pain doesn’t sting as much over time.
As I write this, it’s been 17 months since I lost my firstborn and my best friend. Zach was 29 years old. Since he died I told the Lord that it can’t be for nothing. You have got to turn this around for your glory. You HAVE to make this make sense in one way or the other! I can’t live a day without a purpose after having this huge hole in my heart and I know as I write this, you know exactly how I feel.
With all of this being said, I knew when the Lord gave me a jewelry business that it would be the vessel to carry Zach’s story along with it being my healing therapy. What I didn’t expect was all of the moms that would experience this loss alongside me. Grief for a mom is a very lonely place if you don’t have someone who understands EXACTLY what losing a child feels like. I get it.
I created a line of jewelry for my Zach with anchors. You can click here to read the story about that. In the last couple months the Lord dropped another line of jewelry in my spirit and it’s for us. Check out the line of cuff bracelets I created for you to wear so that even when you are not really feeling like a “warrior”, Mama, you will see this piece and remember that you are.
If I were with you I’d wrap you up in a big hug and tell you…
When you get out of bed everyday…. You are a Warrior.
When you are in a corner crying for days…You are a Warrior.
When you are so mad at God… You are a Warrior.
When you can’t even muster a word in prayer….You are STILL a Warrior.
When you feel you will never get through this….You are still a Warrior.
The Lord knows how we feel and He can handle it. My advice is to just allow the grieving process. Grieve with the Lord. We moms try to hold it all together for everyone else but not this time. This time is for you Mama. Don’t beat yourself up when you have the hard days and question your sanity! Just sit and never put expectations on yourself or allow anyone else to. You literally lost a part of your heart and soul. Give yourself grace.
When you look at this jewelry, let it be a reminder that you are not alone. Let it remind you that not only are we warriors here until we go home but, our children are now commissioned into God’s Army and they are Warriors in Heaven.
Much love from your warrior sister,